Where it happened: her apartment
ok, i was 17, and had just started summer vacation after finishing 11th grade at the top of my class. i was so high on my success, and feeling so confident, that i decided to ask out michelle, who was a friend of my sisters from college. she was 19, and in her freshman year, studying to become an art teacher . i had always had a thing for her, ever since i helped my sister move into her dormitory. i was instantly struck by her exotic features, and smooth, relaxed personality. i could barely look her in the eyes that day, i felt so unequal. i mean, i was a 16 year old member of the school drama club, and she was this sexy, mature 18 year old girl. but that was a year ago, not today. today, i was brimming with pride and self-confidence. today, i felt as if i could take on the world, meet any challenge, and walk away the victor. well, i was about to prove myself right or wrong. i strode briskly up the stairs to michelle’s apartment where she would be staying during her break. as i climbed the stairs, i
slowly became aware of something happening; with each step i took, a little bit more of my self-confidence drained out of me. i became acutely aware of how much i despised this feeling. it was as if my old fears of being around her were attempting to reassert themselves, drawing strength from my self doubt. and then, vicious cycle, these
thoughts fed back into the emotion that drove me. i did my best to shake it off, succeeding a little, and continued to climb the stairs to her third floor apartment. reaching her door, i raised my hand to knock on it… and all my fears rushed in on me at once, like a tidal wave trying to bury me in it’s wake. and then, it was over, and i found myself knocking on her door. once, twice, then once more. as i stood there waiting for an answer, i felt mildly self-removed, almost as if i was standing outside myself, and not actually participating. and then, the door opened, and there, in all her glory, stood beautiful michelle. all five foot, six inches of her creamy complexioned skin,
her dark eyes hiding beneath her darker hair. she was glowing as though she had just worked out. she had the curtains over the window behind her, so only the faintest amount of light from the dying sun was bleeding through. and standing there in her doorway, with the dim
light bathing her in a soft romantic glow, i suddenly became very relaxed, and felt at ease with what i was about to do. i just then realized that i hadn’t said a word to her since she opened the door and, i think seeing my realization for herself, smiled softly, and opened the door a little wider for me to come in. i stepped slowly inside, and heard her close the door behind me. i turned slowly to
face her, and found her smiling at me warmly. i began, rather clumsily, to tell her what i had wanted to say to her on that first day i saw her… that she was the most sensual, gorgeous woman i had ever seen. i opened my mouth to speak… and was momentarily at a loss for words. i closed my mouth, then began again. looking her in the eyes, as i had been unable to do until just now, i spoke slowly, deliberately, measuring my words. “michelle…” i said. “i came here today, because there’s something i’ve always wanted to tell you. i…” looking away from her briefly, i tried to gather my thoughts together. it was then i noticed her smiling at me again, almost in amusement. “god…” she said laughing slightly. “why is this always so hard for men?” i opened my mouth to answer, but she leaned in to me, and whispered softly, “shhh… some other time.” i felt her kiss me then, and i lost myself in her embrace. we embraced eachother for the rest of that evening, i knew her, and she knew me. it was truly the most magical experience of my life.